How do I join a party?
Sign a non-disclosure agreement.
Verify your identity.
Everyone is between 21-42 years of age.
On average: The racial demographics mirror the Chicagoland region as a whole which are 53% white, 22% Latino, 17% African American, 6.4% Asian and 2% other. This is always slightly different based upon the event, but we are proud of the fact that our racial diversity mirrors the region.
Also on average 95% of our attendees are couples and 5% are single females. No single males are allowed.
Some of the attendees consider themselves polyamorous, others as “swingers” and still others are simply “sex-positive” that is they like being around other people who see sex as a positive experience, and not something to feel guilty about.
Why under 42?
We know that many young couples avoid clubs due to the perception that there will be a significant age gap between the average attendee and themselves. We have a number of couples in this group that are in their early 20’s. Remember how old someone 45 seemed when you were 21!
Quite honestly, if you’re 50 years old, you’re going to feel like a fish out of water at our parties. Some of our attendees still live at home with their parents.
There are no refunds, at all, for any reason.
We hold events at various locations in the suburbs of Chicago. We will not give you a location unless you’re (1) a member and (2) ticketed to the event.
Do you allow single people?
Single females can attend.
We do not allow single males.
What should we wear?
It’s almost always ladies who ask this question when they honestly have the least to worry about. Let’s address the guys first.
Dress to impress. Do not wear tennis shoes or a t-shirt unless you are participating in the party theme. For example, if the theme is “Christmas: Naughty or Nice” and you want to wear an ugly Christmas sweater….great! If the theme is “spring break” and you want to wear a tank top because it fits the beach theme…..great! However, if you’re not in theme, err on the side of dressing up.
This doesn’t mean you need to wear designer clothes. Just go with “business casual” or better and you’ll be fine. A shirt with a collar, dress shoes, etc. You will never look foolish by “over dressing,” the guy in suit will look great whereas the guy in the oversized t-shirt will be asked to leave.
Ladies: Wear whatever makes you feel the sexiest. At your typical club there will be women baring a lot, like exposed breasts and barely-there panties. There will also be women almost completely covered. It’s entirely up to you.
You can smoke outside. Not inside.
No illegal drugs are allowed on the premises.
What is speed dating?
We want to be a member, but refuse to sign a non-disclosure or verify our identity?
That’s not possible. There are plenty of other events that accept “cash at the door.” Keep “Googling” and you’ll find many other options.
Why do I need to be a member in order to see events?
We believe in discretion. People who dislike swinger parties, or who are outside the age limit, should not have access to that information. If you’re serious about joining, you go through the process.
What do we need to bring?
If you’re new, you’ll need to bring in a form of identification to show that are between 21-42 years of age. No one will copy your ID or anything like that. Just look at it, and give it back to you.
You’ll need to bring your ticket, either via printed copy or on your phone to be scanned upon entry.
Each specific event has it’s own needs. For example, some events are BYOB and others have a paid bar. You’ll receive more information after you register for an event.
When are your events?
We only give that information to paid members.
Hotel info? Can I stay the night at the club?
We have a hotel booking affiliate, please see the Affiliates section below.
We allow staying the night at the club on Friday night parties, but not Saturday day parties.
What about STDs?
The party is definitely not an orgy. It is like any other bar or nightclub, only the people are much nicer and if you meet someone or a couple that you click with, there are places that you can have sex.
As with any other sexual situation, feel free to talk with potential partners about safe sex, STDs, and ask if they have been tested. No one is going to think you’re weird for asking, in fact, they will appreciate your responsibility.
We highly recommend that you go to Shameless Care and read their free guidebook on STIs and the lifestyle. You’ll know more in 15 minutes than your doctor.
What are the rules of swinging?
The most important rules are to always ask before touching and get an enthusiastic “yes.” All new couples are required to watch a 7-minute video about the rules of the party, and the lifestyle during their tour.
We don't think we're ready for this. We're new!
We’ve been in the lifestyle for ten years. If you are meeting people via websites you will likely have far more drama than you ever would at a club. We have tried this multiple times. You chat with couples online, then agree to meet in person where you may find they no longer look like their online photos or you don’t have chemistry with them but are now stuck in an awkward dinner arrangement. Or you may find that you have great chemistry and meet up several times, however, at some point, a “break-up” will happen…meaning that one couple will want to keep meeting but the other just won’t be “feeling it” anymore.
When you attend a club, you have the opportunity to chat with several couples without the awkwardness. Attendees range from those who just enjoy the atmosphere, to those who like to play with their significant other in a thrilling environment, to full-swap swingers, and everything in between. If you and your significant other can be comfortable being in the presence of naked people without jealously then you will be fine.
I don't have a perfect body. Will I fit in?
This is a question that we hear a lot. You will find that there is every type of body at our events. Swingers come in all shapes and sizes. Believe us, by 10 pm you will be so comfortable you’ll feel like you’ve been attending clubs for years.
We're new, what if I can't perform?
This is so common. Many young, healthy men who have never had an issue suddenly discover they aren’t invincible in a club. Even if you aren’t feeling nervous, your penis might be. If it happens, shrug it off as best you can, it will be better next time, most likely. Again, trust us….it is common for new swingers. Most men in the lifestyle use an ED drug (Viagra, etc.), for this very reason. Shameless Care is the go-to product here because the company its a telemedicine company specifically for people in the swinger/polyamory lifestyle. Use this link.
Definitely. Available here.
ANYONE in the lifestyle should be using Shameless Care for all of their sex-related health care needs. That company is owned by and exclusively caters to lifestyle members. They offer medication and at-home STD testing. Go to their website and take a look.