Over the age of 42?
We are in our late thirties and feel more comfortable at an all-ages event than at YCP. That’s ok because YCP isn’t about the host couple, it’s about getting more very young couples offline and meeting people in the real world.
The good news is that if you’re in your 40’s or 50’s you’re just hitting your prime as far as the swinger lifestyle goes. You’ll feel comfortable at any other event.
If you want to know why we have the age restriction, read the “About Us” page of the website. It’s not because you aren’t hot. As we both know, people are just beginning to gain their confidence in mid-life.
Single men. You’re in higher demand than you might think. Many couples in the lifestyle prefer a MFM threesome over a MFF threesome. You do need to realize that you’re a dime a dozen, and the competition is fierce. Here is my advice on how you can stand out.
#1. Order Bluechew using this link. Your first month is free if you use code YCP upon checkout.
I’m sure you’ve never had erectile dysfunction, but I’m also sure you’ve never been in such an alien environment. There’s a 90% chance your anxiety will get the better of you unless you’re taking an FDA-approved erectile dysfunction drug like Bluechew.
Most women in the lifestyle are moms, who may only be able to go out once or twice a year. She needs you to perform as the chosen single male, that’s your role in this.
Let Bluechew be your insurance policy.
Full disclosure, Bluechew is an affiliate partner of ours. That means when you order through our link, we receive a commission. Hopefully, the rest of this advice is worth that much to you.
#2. Sign up for a website like Kasidie. When you do, have most of your photographs be clothed and do not post a picture of your cock.
Cocks are way overrated. Repeat that line until you believe it. Cocks are way overrated.
Most women want a man who can get hard and who isn’t too large. Practically no one wants a “huge cock,” and most women are rarely in the mood to see unsolicited images of them.
Keep your profile professional, and that alone will put you in the top few percent of single male profiles.
#3. If you write to couples directly, write a lengthy, thoughtful message, and make it personalized. Make the pair realize that you’ve read their profile carefully and spent a good deal of time on the message.
Do not under any circumstances write, “hey” and then one or two sentences. Yeah, you’ve put the “ball in her court” to reply, but she’s not going to. She’s getting 20 messages a day like yours, every day. State your entire case in your opening email.
#4. If you’re going to attend a lifestyle event that allows single men, here is how you should do it.
I learned this advice from reading a book about picking up women called “The Game.”
In the book, true pickup artists agree that when you see a beautiful woman, you have just a couple of seconds to decide if you’re going to approach or not. It has to be an instantaneous decision. Approach her, or never approach her.
The reason is simple…leering is creepy. Yet that’s the number one problem we have with single men at non-ycp clubs. They are afraid to approach, but they are always just “there.”
We look over, and he’s standing there smiling at us, hoping we will ask him to come over.
We go dance, and see he’s made his way to the dance floor.
We go to a playroom, and there he is, watching from a distance.
He’s always there, just waiting for the wave over. It’s both annoying and creepy. If he’d approach, we could tell him we aren’t interested, but he never approaches. Just sits there and hopes that a hot woman will wave him over.
Single men…here is how I’d play it if I were you.
I see a couple that I’m interested in, so I approach and say, “I can only stay a second, but I wanted to let you know that I think you (looking at the woman) are very beautiful. I don’t know if you two are looking for a single male tonight or not, but if so, please find me later, and we can continue this conversation. Don’t worry, I won’t bother you again, but please come find me later if you wish.”
The reason? When you approach and say, “I can only stay a second”, you’ve immediately disarmed them. Everyone is afraid that when a single male approaches a table that he will never leave. They will be much more open to listening to you if you reassure them immediately that you aren’t there to monopolize their time. Then by expressing interest and placing the ball into their court, you’ve made your point and can move on with your night.
Best of luck to you!