In April, the old Facebook group came up with a list of questions that men could ask women before sex. I’ve had the opportunity to ask three women these questions before sex since then, and it has completely changed my approach and improved the quality of the experience for both of us.

I cannot overemphasize how well this worked. The women appreciated it.

Ladies, do you have anything you’d add to these questions?

Men, do you have the courage to sit down and run through these with someone before sex?

These questions did not make the situation awkward at all. I encourage you to screenshot these and keep them on your phone.

During foreplay and sex, how much “making out/kissing” do you prefer?
A. None
B. Occasional. I don’t mind it, but we aren’t making love here.
C. Moderate. Kissing is an integral part of the sex experience.
D. A lot. Kissing adds to the intimacy, and I desire sex to be very intimate.

How many fingers do you like during “fingering?”
A. One
B. Two
C. Three
D. I prefer not to be fingered

Where do you want him to finish?
A. In condom
B. In you
C. In mouth
D. On tits, ass, stomach
E. On face

Do you like to talk dirty during sex?
A. Yes, a lot of it
B. No way
C. Sometimes, when it feels right

If you like dirty talk, do you like to be called a slut, etc.?
A. Yes
B. No

How aggressive do you like touching to be during sex?
A. Gentle, caressing
B. Not too gentle, but not aggressive either
C. Tough! Aggressive!
D. Punch me in the face (not exactly, but ya get the drift)

What is most likely to make you climax?
A. Clitoral stimulation
B. Nipple play
C. Penetration
D. Sexual position

How important is an orgasm to your experience?
A. Not at all
B. not very much
C. it’d be nice
D. you’re not leaving until I come

This question assumes the play session involves 2 M/F couples:
How much time do you want with your own SO vs. with me or my SO?
A. Mostly with my own SO.
B. Mostly with your SO
C. Mostly with you
D. Equal time with all 3

How gentle or rough do you like someone to be with your breasts/nipples?
A. Gentle, caressing
B. Not too gentle, but not aggressive either
C. Tough! Pinching, etc.

Do you like thrusts your be hard/deep or soft/shallow? Or another combo?
A. Soft, gentle, never go as deep as you can.
B. Start slow and gentle, and eventually hard.
C. Hammer my cervix